HTFU

I've had a bad week in EVE.

Not a lost-a-billion-ISK-ship, did-my-entire-wallet-on-the-market, accidentally-trashed-a-cap-blueprint sort of bad week. Those are shit-happens-in-EVE weeks, they happen, I swear a bit (all right, a lot) and then I get on with my gaming.  Dealing with setbacks due to either your own stupidity or someone else's smartness is part of EVE and if you don't cope with (I'll go so far as to say relish) the challenge, EVE is probably not the game for you.

But there are some things that nobody should have to 'cope with', not in games, not on the internet, not in real life. Racism, sexism, homophobia, misogyny, vilification, and threats of actual, real-life harm are not a 'challenge' to be coped with nor are they 'part of EVE', folks, and no, it's not okay because it's 'just the internet' or 'just a game'. And this week, I and several good EVE friends have been on the receiving end of all of the above.

Now, I can already hear the cries of 'HTFU!' from here.

Here's my question to you: why should I be the only one to HTFU? Why is the onus on women, non-Caucasians, and GLTBI people to 'grow a thicker skin' or 'stop being sensitive'?

Why is it up to us to avoid tramping the tender sensitivities of those who casually refer to 'raping those faggots' in the WT corporation by never, ever, on any occasion pointing out the inherent sexism and homophobia in the language used? Why is it up to us not to make a fuss about nothing, but never up to those who start forum threadnaughts about the outrageous unfairness of anyone naming the calling of space-wealthy players 'jews' as the antisemitism it is?  Why does freedom of speech apparently protect the rights of those who call me 'bitch', 'whore' and 'slut' but not my right to call them 'misogynist'?

And why is the choice presented to me to 'HTFU or GTFO' of a game I love but never to the fragile flowers who find being called out on their language and behavior to 'ruin their fun'?

It boggles my mind that people who choose to play a game whose entire ethos is 'actions have consequences' act like it's grotesquely unfair that their actions have consequences.

Admittedly, some of those consequences are pretty serious: using a "carriage service" (i.e. the internet) to threaten, intimidate and harass is a crime in a lot of jurisdictions and you might be surprised to discover that the one you live in might be one of many with inter-state and international agreements covering the prosecution of such crimes.  Certain behavior is against the EULA: CCP can toss you from the game for it.  But you know, there's an old saying about 'not doing the crime if you can't do the time' that comes to mind here. If you don't want your local LEOs knocking on your door, don't press send on that OOG email threatening to rape someone IRL. Not rocket science, people! (And even Rocket Science only takes 21 days to train to level V).

Some consequences are more minor: you might get tossed from a chat channel, banned from a forum, blocked by a player or a group of players.

Or ganked. Or awarded a 10 billion bounty. Or wardecced.

Some of those consequences are interpersonal: the people around you, the people you play the game with, are going to form opinions about you based on what you say, and how you react when people call you on what you say.  (Pro-tip: if the mails along the lines of 'Thanks for saying that; I wish I had the courage to' that flash into my inbox when I point out sexism and homophobia are any indication, the fact that nobody is telling you they think you're an asshole doesn't mean you're not actually making an ass of yourself. And you know, those 'bitches', 'faggots', and 'spics' that you don't know you have in your corp just might get pissed off enough to show you another consequence with a grand old EVE tradition: the awox).

I know the tired old accusation of 'politically correct censorship' is trotted out whenever anyone names bigotry for what it is, but if you're starting to froth about 'banning words' or 'censoring free speech' I suggest you go back to the beginning and read again, carefully.  I completely accept your right to be however much of a racist, sexist, homophobic fuckwit you choose to be. I even accept your right, as a free individual and (possibly) an adult, to decide to break the law.

I don't accept your right to whine about what happens next, any more than the player who undocked a shuttle so full of PLEX it was a playtime pinata has the right to whine about getting ganked.

Actions have consequences.

HTFU and accept them.